Hey there, other guys who fuck real good — we’re a rare breed, aren’t we? We always try to keep our weird, nerdy quirk to ourselves, but sometimes, our undeniable prowess at fucking causes some problems in our day-to-day life that those other “only ok at fucking” people simply just won’t understand.
Just in case you’re feeling alone & embarrassed, here’s 8 Problems That Only Guys Who Fuck Real Good Will Understand. Don’t be shy! Please read and share…but ONLY if you understand
1. When She’s TOO Satisfied
This is a common problem for us Fuck-Too-Goods. Sometimes, you’ll leave your partner TOO satisfied that they won’t be able to think or concentrate on anything else other than how well they were just made love to. Fortunately, this will eventually dissipate, but unfortunately, then they’ll just want to fuck again. Such is the cross we bear, right fellow Goodfuckers???
2. When She Screams Too Loud and It Wakes the Neighbors
This happens literally every time you have sex. With 100% certainty, your partner will squeal in ecstasy, then the next thing you know, there’s your angry neighbors banging on your door in striped pajamas and sleeping caps, telling you to keep it down.
Sorry, Only-Ok-Fucker! You just don’t understand us ;-*
3. When You Fuck So Well For So Long You Suddenly Realize You’ve Missed Christmas
How many times has this happened to you: You finally wrap-up a steamy, marathon fuck-session only to glance over at the calendar and realize it’s December 27th, and you’ve both fucked your way through Christmas. Uhoh! Too bad your family won’t understand why you didn’t go see them… and we all know why they don’t GET it ;-0 ;-0
4. When People Talk About Having Fewer Than Eighty Orgasms And You’re Confused
Oh man, your co-worker’s talking about some HOT lovemaking session he had where his lady had… lol… TWO orgasms?? Hahaha better bite your tongue, fellow Fuckgoods, cause when you start talkin’ about how your lady averages 80-90 orgasms per night (including nights you don’t fuck…which is NO nights!!!!!), they’ll think you’re exaggerating. Yeah – exaggerating like a FUCKFOX!
5. When Your Partner Simply Cannot Believe That Your Enormous, Impressive Penis Isn’t CGI’d and You Have To Spend Three Hours Proving It
Not this ol’ problem again! I mean, who can blame them, but still, it’s gonna delay the love-makin’ by a couple hours. Their loss, really.
6. When Your Partner Orgasms So Hard, She Forgets How To Speak English Forever
This one’s a real doozy. Everything’s going great, you’re coming up on orgasm #85 or so, and all the sudden, BAM! She climaxes so hard, she rescinds the ability to speak or comprehend English, and you have to begin tutoring her from the bottom-up, starting with basic letters and phonetic sounds. Fortunately, her burning desire to learn English as a way to communicate how well she was just made love to will speed up the learning process far beyond that of traditional learning curves.
7. When the Intensity Of Your Fucking Rips Open a Hole in the Space-Time Continuum and Genghis Khan Pops Out and You Have to Defeat Him With Your Fucking
Don’t even get me started on this. Sometimes I think all of us “Way Too Good At Sex” Dudes would have it a little easier if we were just a little bit imperfect at having sex, but we simply don’t know another way. It’s a blessing and a curse.
8. When People Assume You’re Going REALLY Far Out Of Your Way To Convince Everyone You’re Impossibly Great At Fucking , When In Reality That’s Simply Just How Good You Are At It and You Can’t Help It
Haha oh people. Always SO jealous and suspicious.
Anyway, please now share this on Facebook in a really forced self-deprecating manner. But ONLY if you UNDERSTAND
I think we all know how you get to this point.